"GREAT!?" replied amman with a sense of confusion of its sincerity, which only felt perplexing due to the investigator's perceived response to his question. amman and the inquirer looked at each other dubiously, each wondering of the intention of their utterances. ok, amman's being snarky again so let's just get on with it...
seriously though, i do feel great. i'm in a better place than i have ever been in my life. that said, i'm not happy either perhaps somewhat content depending on your definition of content. but the melancholy, poverty and poor health of my terrible 20s pale in comparison to my present state of delusive exuberance. so the word "great" doesn't necessarily hold true to its definition either but rather to its relevance.
my late teens and early 20s were what i now refer to as the dark ages but coming into my mid 20s and moving onwards a very, very, VERY slow progression into an amman renaissance took place. some of which has been documented here along the way. i'm still amidst this renaissance, happily, and it has come a long way but i want to ride it much longer and further. this wave of the future.
HARDER BETTER FASTER STRONGER
i've been neglecting my blog, my baby, my heart and soul. the downside of not being on a personal down slide.
so in response to how i feel about being 30?
it's aight.
I hope you had a "great" birthday. Sorry. Couldn't resist. I have quite a few years on you Amman being in my really, really, really late 20's. I can honestly say I like where my head is now a lot more than I did at 30.
ReplyDeletePhysically it would be nice to go back to a younger, slimmer body but mentally, emotionally, age is a wonderful thing. There can be a feeling of calm when the younger ones around you are scattered and unsettled. You will look at their silly little lives, though I think you already do this, and smile to yourself at how far you have come.
If the price of this growth and maturity is not having blog fodder than that is okay too. Life doesn't have to be full of suffering and angst.
You are as happy as you want to be. 30? Really? Fuck you are getting old.